This painting did not start with this title, though the vision of it came out very vividly and quickly in my mind when I was feeling into what wanted to come out of the canvas one day. I decided to keep the orb-like shape almost untouched, leaving the white canvas blank inside, but with a rainbow array of colors spreading from the center out at the base. If you stand in front of this painting the size of a very large mirror, it has the movement of both expansion and contraction, spreading out and coming home. Right now, as I have returned to my home country, Japan, but in a new city, and moved away from my “home” of almost thirty years in the US, I rediscovered a new feeling of home, and remembered how I was feeling when I painted this work a year ago. This work is about returning home, to your inner world that anchors you to who you are, stripped of any responsibilities, titles, or expectations, to the light, the furnace, the love that we innately hold at birth. It is catastrophic that people’s homes are being destroyed, uprooted, and vanished, not just the infrastructure, but along with their memories, their identities, and communal ground. I wonder if the way people survive such tragedies, or any life-altering threat, is because of this pilot light of their inner home that is very hard to extinguish. This light can feel small and faint, even if the exterior world may look lush and splendid. This light can feel like a glowing balloon when you are in an environment that fits you just right. I have been thinking about this, comparing my life in the US and my new life in Japan. At what place or space did I feel this sense of home throughout my life? Was I able to find it where I thought I would? Or did I not pay attention to pursue this sense of security and belonging? I’ve come to understand that tuning into this feeling—every day, every moment, with intention—is key to truly knowing oneself. From that awareness flow the thoughts and actions,

Shizuka Kusayanagi

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Painter and dwriter (draw & writer), now based in Fukuoka, Japan. I’m passionate about art as a way of connecting—both with oneself and with others. I believe there’s no hierarchy among art forms. My practice ranges from oil paintings on linen to single-panel cartoons on index cards, and inclusive, all-ages art workshops. More to come.